Principles of life.

I have several.


1. Honesty is more important than anybody's self esteem (excluding mine of course).
2. Fun > money when money > 0. Otherwise money > fun.
3. Never force your opinion onto somebody else unless their decision can potentially screw them over (smoking, doing drugs, drawing penises on their answer script, reading twilight)
4. Nobody fucks with my friends except their friends.
5. The Master Chief is better than Bub and Bob.
6. Han shot first because I can't remember the other guy's name.
7. Don't judge people until spending at least 2 hours in their presence, though it usually doesn't matter because they're all assholes anyway.
8. To the males it might concern: Don't touch me in inappropriate places, don't kiss me, none of your bodily fluids shall come in contact with me, and you will have nothing to do with my anus. Other than that it's cool.
9. Not even girls may have anything to do with my anus. Exit only.


and finally 


10. If Mygirlfriend > 0, Mygirlfriend > Yourgirlfriend

Lol NJC

Now I have something to blog about, yay!

It's their schoolwork, if anything blame the dudes who set the curriculum, I dunno what they were thinking. Joanne tells me that they're supposed to plan how to take over a school, and these guys so happened to pick ours. And post it on facebook. Which was, in my honest opinion, quite a dumb move. Pretty easy to misinterpret, and all.
But chill, guys, chill. It r k. Don't tie your balls in a knot over it.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=156817&id=546506250&ref=nf
That's the thing I'm referring to.
Seriously. It's schoolwork.

10 Things I don't understand.

Neo-conservatives
It's new and conservative at the same time. I don't know how that's supposed to work.

An award winner presenting the awards.
"...Ah Lian from class 5.19; and myself, Ah Kow. I will also be presenting the challenge trophy to the the principal."

Celebrity charity drives and organisations
Donating $10000 to charity even though they earn roughly US$5 mil per year and have a hot husband/wife and 2 dogs and 5 cats and 7 cars and 9 fish ponds and 58 man servants and 300 fish and an immeasurable number of Swedish of sex slaves. And no kids.

Women
I don't get it.

Kanye West
"I'm happy for you, I'ma let you finish."

Nucular
North Korea has many nucular weapons.

The Scottish
Cause nobody can actually understand them. Except other Scots.

High School Musical
It's clearly a movie. Dude.

High School Musical 2
Still a movie. Still annoying.

High School Musical 3
Dear lord why?!

Who needs a SNAG

When you've got the INAG. People nowadays are swooning and dribbling over Sensitive New Age Guys, but tell me, if everybody becomes sensitive and new age, where's the novelty? That's why we need more Insensitive New Age Guys.

Way better than SNAGs, INAGs, contrary to what the name suggests, do care about how you feel, they just don't act upon that care very much. INAGs carry honesty and truth as their main principles of life, not afraid to let other people know that they don't care, and believing that telling the truth is more important than your self-esteem.

SNAGs will lie that your outfit doesn't make you look fat. Do you really want this kind of person? Sucking up to you, never telling you the truth in fear of you being hurt. For instance, if you knew that he was having an affair and he lied to you, wouldn't you be hurt?

INAGs, on the other hand, don't give a shit! "Yes, you look fat in that. In fact, you are fat. Don't get angry at me over that, I'm still dating you over other, skinnier people, aren't I? Oh, and by the way, I'm making love to your little sister every weekend, sorry. It's not that I don't love you, she's just hotter."

...Sure they sound unappealing now, but you'll come to love it! Break up with your SNAG and find an INAG today.
INAGs will not be held responsible for any and all hurt feelings suffered due to their actions. By dating an INAG you acknowledge that it is their inherent nature to be completely honest regardless of whether you like it or not, and recognise that they are only the way they are because they either i) love you OR ii) don't love you and want to get rid of you.
Conditions apply.

Lambda

I have a love affair with that greek letter. It's awesome. It's like a triangle, you know. Except with no base.

I'm just talking shit here this is what I do when I'm bored. That, and doodle, and oh shit I promised myself I'd draw stuff and post it up.
I don't even hand in the homework I give myself, go figure.

Pencil time is now.

I'm not blogging from school!

Yeah I'm back home. Went to Charles' house to play shit and not do jian bao cough cough. Forza and Vegas are the two most ridiculous games in existence, in my world. Only Tom Clancy would help produce a game that in coop story mode lets you sit in a helicopter without any dialogue for the entire duration of a dialogue that would be there in single player story mode.

Thanks, Tom Clancy.

I'm blogging from school!

What I said!

okay I should be doing work

but short blogging break cause it just hit me: people in my school get retained for things such as not enough CIP hours or an unsatisfactory philosophy paper.

However there're people in the normal stream getting retained for actual bad grades. I mean, it doesn't make much sense to me if we're getting retained for something less consequential to our future jobs (unless we're philosophers or charity fund associates) while those in the normal stream are actually getting retained because their academic ability is low and they would not be able to find decent jobs otherwise.

We, on the other hand, are in the IP stream - I don't mean to sound complacent or elitist - and stand a fairly larger chance of landing a job even if we aren't as strong as compared to the rest of the IP cohort. Because it's the IP cohort. They're all smart.

Just because you're the low end of the top 10% in Singapore doesn't make you stupid, it makes you less smart than the top 9%. Which, by all accounts, is already very impressive.

So what the heck is going on with this retaining shit.

Bloggin'

I am bloggin' instead of doing my work. I've got to finish as many 剪报 as mentally possible in one day. Woo. But it's only 2 pm, so screw it. I imagine if I hand in some at least she'll give me more time to finish the rest.

Last night was Esperenza, the charity thing organized by those people from NYGH. It wasn't bad, that Phillip guy is damn pro, and the Rumplestiltskin skit was quite good; though the other 2 were shit. I also found Chinese dance better than their modern counterpart. Wei Yang, Bynes and Matthew Wong were freaking late, so they missed the first half - and the best part is that after I went out in the middle of Chinese dance to give Wei Yang his ticket, we came back in to see them finish and the emcees let us 'have a short break'.

When I heard some band from HC called 'My Bittersweet Addiction' was performing, being the critical bastard that I am, I lol'd. Of course, when one of your Primary school friends is one of them, it makes it that much harder for you to come up with insults. That what's-his-name (Yu something) singer/guitar guy was their saving grace - they weren't bad; they just weren't good. That's right, Choong Hsiong, your auto-tuning thing failed.

Peter Koh was also there helping out disabled people. What a nice guy. Damn blur, though. "Where's my bag?!"
(I was holding it.)

So that was last night. This night is full of Chinese homework. Shit.

This is quote

This is a quote meant for those people on the internet and MSN who think that quoting makes you sound intelligent.

Oh, snap!

Manliest man in the history of manly men. I want his babies.

I'll steal them, or some shit.

He even made me make a new label. That's the level of awesome he exudes.

People say

That I sound really emo and angsty over the internet. I don't deny that I sound that way, I'm just not. Because it's the internet.

The internet lacks a lot of things such as tone and body language and winking and middle fingering and slack-jawed disbelief; if you're judging me by what I sound like over the internet then...  don't.

No, I'm not going to use more caps or spam exclamation marks after the end of every sentence, nor am I going to overuse smilies or shorten the shit out of the English language just to sound more enthusiastic or pleasant or exciting or emotional or happy or whatever the hell it is I'm supposed to sound like. :)
Okay so I guess a smiley or two won't hurt. I just can't stand people who overuse them.

My caps lock button and exclamation marks are reserved for when I feel particularly cynical.

And I swear, if I hear Avery say 'fuck' one more time I'll fucking pop a fucking cap in his fucking sorry ass fucking fuck. Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuckens.
Irony is the greatest form of comedy. Laugh, fucker.

Epiphany.

In case any of you so happened to be wondering why I don't often make long blog posts, the one before this would be my answer. I didn't know I could write so badly, damn.

Anyway, I just changed the blogskin because all that white was burning a hole through my retina. And for now I think I'll edit the last post to make it sound less like a 12 year old girl wrote it.

Justin's personal definitions

Rock

n. 1. The one that beats scissors
2. Rock and Roll

v. to rock, rocking: 1. To be awesome

Synonyms: Not you


Gullible

adj. 1. To be so incomprehensibly intelligent and witty that it almost stops becoming funny. Almost.

Synonyms: Green Bears


Blur

adj. 1. ...what?

Synonyms: Jonathan Lim


Development Hell

n. In ~: 1. The state of nearly existing, but not really.

Synonyms: Duke Nukem Forever; Your testicles; My art

Chingchang walawala bingbang

i don't understand how you all find content to blog with every day. I mean, my daily life is about as interesting as an orange. Not even an interesting orange, no, just an orange. Maybe even a dull orange.

So I figured that I'll try something different: I'll draw shit and put it up here. Because i can. Also, I'm an art student, if you didn't know by now; and if you didn't and also know me personally you should probably just go off yourself with the nearest sharp object you can find.

So I will draw something.

And I will post it.



Hopefully.

Today...

I have a new definition of pain.

Imagine having cramps 5 places in each leg, every one preventing you from stretching out the other cramps that you have. Now imagine having a twisted ankle, a twisted knee, a bruise on your ass and a headache stemmed from getting kicked in the head.

Now imagine feeling all of that at once.

ow.

I also now realise how someone landing on you isn't actually that painful at all, compared to... well, everything else.