Boredom.

boring boredom. of boring-nicity. that's what I'm experiencing now.

I don't even have anything interesting to write about.

...I don't know why I'm even posting this.

Last post of swear-embargo

And you all lucky for it. I feel particularly sweary today.

Today I shall say very little and give you all a quote, after which I will link as many girls to this post as possible, and so should you. I just want to understand why this is, girls, why

From bash.org:
"DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired."

I have to learn how to play the harmonica

you know, to make up for the fact that I can only play the clarinet with reasonable skill, and also because harmonicas are sexy.

that's really all I had to say, besides that tomorrow's the last day of my time wearing that blasted blue tie, woo. Wei Yang that RI boy is leaving for RI and Song Jing that boy is leaving for Songjingland, won't be seeing them next year in school, unfortunately. Still! Holidays are for the being social (antisocial if you're Joel), so many outings will be had, I think.

But their leaving isn't so bad, means we get less competition for the chicks. Amirite.

Optimistic, that's me!

It's funny, you know.

I realise that I write the best when I'm as mentally and physically taxed as possible without passing out. Before lit finals this year, i got 4 hours of sleep in the morning and was sick when sitting for both papers; It's the highest grade I've gotten all year.

So from now on before I write anything I make sure I'm not thinking as clearly as I should be, no matter what it takes. Most of the time it's being sleepy.

Of course when you can't think straight whatever you're feeling tends to bloat into uncontrollable emotion, so I'll seem very bipolar but oh well. For safety's sake, I'm going to rip out the 'f', 'u', 'c' and 'k' letters out of my keyboard for the rest of the post.

Now I now I tal a lot abot video games already and it maes me sond so nerdy, God, bt when I was a yonger one o my avorite games o all time was Poemon. Livia wold now that also. The best version o it I thin wold be Gold and Silver, so I don't now why the I only ind ot that they were remaing both a ew months beore English release.

Now I'm a very sentimental gy - I ried when I had to swith shools bease o GEP in P4, I won't deny it, thogh I don't regret it - so even something as hildish, lihed and overdone as Poemon has a speial plae in my heart, and I pray to God that they won't mae anymore or I'll rn ot o money. Exept i they remae Yellow, in whih ase I will ry nrelenting tears o both joy and shame or how I'm sh a loser.

Anyway, last 4 days o shool oming p, woot! I'm now being all nostalgi abot my last or years in this shool, bt it isn't so bad ase I'm gonna be here or another 2 ing years anyway. On the p side, girls! Onwaaarrd

I'm looking back at my old posts

and I think my writing's been getting exponentially worse. This may or may not be due to nearly giving myself a light concussion while trying to learn how to kip up; and also may or may not be due to the fact that this year has probably been more mentally and emotionally taxing than talking to Jonathan for 20 minutes.

Oh, right, i have to learn my bleeding hiragana.

You know, guys, just because I'm learning the language doesn't mean I have to be as enthu and obsessive over it as all of you are. I can't believe that you all try to make me feel inadequate and try to be funny by telling me that I haven't memorized my hiragana as quickly as you have.

It actually only disables my ability to retort because my head is filled with thoughts of how big of a dumbass you are and how much you don't fucking get it.

Humour has to be situational. The best humour you find out there deals with popular culture or recent/famous events, because everybody knows about them. If I walk myself into a joke then shame on me, if the opportunity for a joke about me presents itself then sucks to be me; but you can't suddenly bring up a joke about my indonesian relatives in the middle of math class and expect anybody to find it even mildly amusing.

That's not being funny, that's being a total prick, really, you can't deal a blow any lower or go any shallower than you already are if you have to resort to bringing up random things about somebody else's heritage in a way that's meant to be derogatory and play dumb about it to try to be funny.

On the exact same hand but maybe a different finger, telling me that I'm a loser cause I haven't spent my time mugging a Japanese course that you are masturbating over is possibly one of the fucking stupidest things I've ever heard.

"Hey Justin, I bet I can wank faster than you can."
"Oh, really now. Tell me why the fuck I'd care, please."
"Haha, I bet you wank real slow, what a loser."

Ooh well lookie here

I've been playing so much Halo 3 and ODST and doing so many exams that i totally forgot that this thing even existed.

Oh, yeah, I got ODST. And I finished the campaign. The ending wasn't exactly what I hoped it'd be, and the final firefight was a landfill worth of boring compared to the joyous banshee obliterating fun I had earlier as a black dude with a sniper rifle. Oh well, at least Vergil is adorable.

Anyway the exams are over and I'm not even going to begin talking about how I did cause I don't want to think about it, so PARTY TIME, BITCHES.

The Bungie.net card thing

You know I actually had no idea that I could do that.
Funkeh.

I am still undoubtably, out of everybody I know, king of forceful vehicle operator removal. I am awesome.

Let us speculate

I believe that after 4.54 billion years, God has gotten pretty bored. After the making of the Earth, creating life, and the birth and death of Jesus, he ran out of things to do, so he decided to let us kill ourselves.

We are, however, taking way too much time to die, so he decided every now and then to come in and nudge us along, much like how you set your city on fire and watch it burn to the ground in SimCity. This resulted in things such as the Great Depression, World War II, George W. Bush and the internet. But somehow we managed to turn all of them around with the intervention of (ironically)World War II, nukes, the presidential term and porn, respectively. So this time God pulled a double Shyamalan on us and created a problem we can't possibly solve without nuclear genocide - he introduced the internet to morons. Very cunning, if you ask me.

This has resulted in Lolcats, 2G1C and Mousehunt. Why do I think God did it, you ask? Because I refuse to believe that he would make a bunch of people who complain that they - for 3 hours a week - are unable to click a fucking button every fifteen minutes without the intent of having half the population go apeshit and murdering the other half in hope of cleansing the world of these wastes of resources.

I don't know.

I'm starting to sing with myself now. Not to myself, no, with myself. Considering doing anything of the sort to myself is sign of insanity, this can't be a good thing.

All I need now is to learn to play the guitar.

One more thing!

One more thing that i don't understand is those people who harbour some sort of resentment towards a given article that makes minced dick out of one of their favourite pass-times/porn stars, yet can't accumulate enough (figurative) balls to give the writer a straight 'fuck you'.

Of course, the guy who does give a straight 'fuck you' is also an idiot, but at the very least has more figurative testicles than the guy who hides behind a pretense of politeness that is obviously there to try to 'be the bigger man' and 'be objective'.

First of all, 'being the bigger man' means jack shit on the internet, cause the person you're conversing with may very well have a vagina and you wouldn't even know. My disregard of figures of speech aside, trying to 'be the bigger man' ends up sounding incredibly condescending most of the time and comes off as trying way too hard not to show that you actually want to grind his face into the pavement. There is only one given exception to this, and that exception is when the article you're so pissed off at was written by a fucking idiot.

Secondly, but definitely not least(ly), you can't 'be objective' because the fact that the article pissed you off means that you disagree with him, jackass. I read something online that dissed the shit out a particular game for humours sake, talking about how everybody who played it was a complete idiot and had no life, and WoW was it funny; one of the comments could be summarized by "That was hilarious lol but I have a life I play sports and have a family. Your last two points were good ones, though."

For one, you're trying to prove to someone that you have a life over the internet, which by all reasonable understanding is completely contradictory. For two, it's the fucking internet, who do you have to prove yourself to? Not like they know you or anything, screw them. The very fact that you're defending yourself against that means three things:
1. You're an idiot.
2. Your self-esteem must be somewhere in the 13th circle of hell.
3. You're an idiot.

Furthermore, if you went through all the trouble of trying to disprove the article, saying that he makes a couple of good points would be counterproductive, you think? Imagine for a moment that someone tells you that your babymaker is shorter than 6 inches (girls must do this too), then you say, "Well I have an average sized lovestick, you know, cause the worldwide average is around 5.5, not 6. But I guess you're a little bit right."

That's like saying "No I'm not an idiot, but I guess I am a little bit of one."

Doesn't work, friend. Your vagplug is still shorter than 6 inches, and the other guy's still right, with the added bonus of knowing that you're an utter dumbass.

Edit: Feel free to go rancorous over this post and prove me right again kthx.

I learned something new today

That the Spartan Laser's official name is the Weapon/Anti-Vehicle Model 6 Grindell/Galileian Nonlinear Rifle. Also known as the WAV M6 GGNoR.
Also known as the Windows AntiVirus Model 6 Good Game no Remake.

P.S. I lied about talking about Jew's Clues. Tough luck.

Rocktober

October means that exams are near oh no I'm screwed, and I've still got to stay back on monday to finish my final piece for art. Feh.

October also means that exams will be over soon woohoo I can buy ODST.

I haven't finished it because Derek had to take it back a day after we borrowed it :/. Total shit, now I have no idea what happens in the end, and I was only 2 missions from it. But it's a very nice game - the campaign, firefight, the mythic disk (which I didn't actually load in so I'll have to wait till i buy it).

You know how Halo always had awesome campaigns with vehicle sequences and on-foot sequences in good moderation? ODST now has on-foot sequences, vehicle sequences, and fuckin CSI sequences, baby. CAD makes good comic about it, go read. It's both completely ridiculous and fun at the same time, I've always hated the bits in Halo where your marines all kick it and you're alone against a bajillion brutes with an assault rifle and a battle rifle with 6 bullets, but this time it's different: there're only about a zillion brutes which you can avoid if you're patient enough, while through the day sequences you'll be finding yourself buddies every so often so you're not usually going rambo like a dumbass.

I'll talk about Jew's Clues next time, brainchild of everybody at the lunch table this afternoon.